A Testimony - Part 1

Hello. My name is Jason Grimm. This is my story, at least in part. Feel free to skip to the good stuff if you want. I think this is mostly going to be a record of my journey and some of the cool things God shows me along the way. It's easy to forget really important moments. If nothing else, hopefully this blog will help keep those moments from being buried in the halls of my memory. If anyone else finds inspiration or entertainment from part of my story, that's a great bonus. So, here we go...

I started playing drums years when I joined  the sixth grade band. And for the next ten or twelve years that is all I wanted to do. It was very much an obsession. During the course of this time I had many opportunities to play with many different groups, varying stylistically from classic country to jazz, to progressive metal. There were also a few church-related gigs thrown in, but at the time, I wasn't too interested in church music. (note: I always thought of myself as a Christian, but my life didn't very well reflect the life of Christ.)

Fast forward a few more years. I was living in Virginia with my brother, who had recently given his life to Christ. He had remarkably changed, and was only listening to contemporary Christian music; imagine my shock at discovering that the very guy who turned me onto drumming and hard rock music now only listening to what i thought was "boring and generic" music. I had been schooled on classic rock & roll, jazz, and metal. This Christian stuff, despite the wonderful lyrical content, had very little appeal to me... But something changed. A transformation had begun in me that I was not aware of until it was far too late to escape its effects. Gradually, my brother's music started seeping into my head, and my heart. God had finally grabbed hold of me after so many years of struggling to find myself outside of Him.

A couple years later, I had gotten to the place where I only wanted to listen to and play music that would glorify God. What started as a minor annoyance had completely overtaken my life in ways that I was not ready for. I began drumming with a great folk/jam worship band, and as often happens when trying to learn a new song, the drummer became bored while waiting for the other musicians to figure out how the song was supposed to go. In a moment of "let's get the show on the road" I suggested I could sing the song to establish the melody, so the real singers could figure it out. I was perfectly content behind the fortress of my drumkit, and had no ambition to sing, but God had another plan. (I must add that up until this time I was paralyzed with fear of singing in front of anyone. I was very self-conscious of my voice, expecting insult and injury to follow any time I opened my mouth. The fear was so overwhelming that I couldn't even sing in my apartment if I knew my neighbors were home.) I sang the song during rehearsal, and they asked me to sing it the following night in front of a real audience. I completely freaked out, but surrendered my will to be used by the Lord. I was still afraid, but during the song the next night, I noticed people worshiping and even crying as I sang. It was all new to me, but I knew God was in it. I also noticed that the petrifying fear had also left me. Even now as I type this the verse comes to mind "perfect love casts out fear." And as the fear left, God's peace and reassurance rushed in to fill the void that remained. It was as though God came near and said to me, "See, I have made you for things bigger than the smallness of your own thinking. You are a worship leader." But I didn't know the first thing about leading worship. Nevertheless, here we are today.

I can now say that, despite my fear and less-than-stellar past, I am a worship leader. God had this in mind all along, even though I was trying to run from His calling and hide behind the drums. I thought that true freedom could be found in trying to make something of my life, in trying to fulfill my own dreams and desires. But, like Jesus said in the Sermon on the Mount, "If you lose your life for My sake, you will find it.", I have discovered, by God's mercy and patience, that complete and total surrender is the way to truly finding freedom. - "Not My will, but Thy will be done."

Since that life-changing night, God has been moving all through my life, increasing my territory for His glory. I rarely get to play drums these days, but I have found a new love for bass and guitar. Worship, to me, is more than singing a few songs. It encompasses every area of my life. To quote Chris Tomlin, "How can I keep from singing Your praise?" All I want to do is worship the Lord, to spend my time in His presence, and to help others not only get into this same place, but to cultivate a lifestyle of worship in their own lives. As followers of Christ, we are to be in constant communion with Him. He is the Bridge straight to the Father's heart, and has given us such a wonderful opportunity to meet with Him in His Presence. I can't help but want to share this with everyone who will listen. Let the rivers of living water flow.